This is a love letter to all you moms out there, the ones with the great kids.

You know who you are. Your kids are great because you are great.

Buy the t-shirt:  You are awesome.

I recently posted something that resonated deeply based on reposts, shares and smiling emojis, which we all know is the measurement for success in life. 😉

“You will never speak to anyone more than you speak to yourself in your head. Be kind.”

(Click here to download a printable of this inspirational quote!)

I have a non-stop conversation with myself, and a lot of the dialogue isn’t good.

Here’s the thing: on any given day I can be a hero, or I can feel like the worst mother in the world. Depending on whether it is Monday or Tuesday, I can be on top or it can be falling apart. Most days, I barely keep it together.

We are all trying to do the best we can, but have set unreal expectations. Back-to-school proves we are running at a breakneck pace we can’t keep up with. And we are keeping up with the rat race on social media.

As if being a mom in 2017 isn’t hard enough, there is social media to drive home the message that you are failing. It used to be that you’d try to keep up with the Joneses, but now it’s the entire neighbourhoodWe compare… and find ourselves wanting.

She went for a run today while I sat in my PJs and ate chips.

She took her kids apple picking while I let them have iPads all day.

She is balancing work and kids and I’m unbalanced.

We aren’t the first generation of mothers to compare ourselves to our peers.

I grew up in a small bucolic town, where the divide between stay-at-home and working mom was wide. The judgments flowed fast and free. Today, we don’t simply peek into each other’s lives – we are voyeurs. And, though we all know that social media isn’t real – we don’t post the tantrums, just the smiles – it takes a toll.

Different studies show that social media can increase depression and it triggers feelings of jealousy and envy; by comparing our lives to others, our mental health suffers.  

But, I also know my mom friends love going on social media – it is their time, to scroll through pictures, get inspiration for dinner or for workouts, look at pretty clothes and see inspirational memes. We’re not posting pictures of our kids to make other people feel bad – we’re doing it because we are proud of our lives. Sometimes I post a picture of my green smoothie because hey, I nailed that green smoothie, and I want others to notice.

We all want to be adored.

I think it is time we start celebrating each other, and see if we start feeling better about this whole mom thing.  I’m fiercely proud of my mom friends – the producers and teachers, politicians and TV personalities, yoga instructors, doctors, , ones running businesses from home or just taking time off to be a mom.

You are living life with kids. That, my friends, should be honoured.

We beat ourselves up continually over the times we yelled or were looking at our phones instead of another cartwheel; when we decided that waffles three nights in a row wasn’t such a big deal (there was cucumber on the side, right?). We get into bed and go over everything we did wrong.

Tonight, I want you to take out your gratitude journal, which I know you’re all keeping. You are going to start a new page and write “Reasons Why I Am Awesome.” And you’re going to list three things. They can be the same things every day… it doesn’t matter. What is important is that you will remind yourself why you are amazing.

Your kids love you – that should be thing #1.

Tomorrow we will get up and look in the mirror and say, Hey girl, you’re awesome.

You might make mistakes today; you probably will. Shoot for gold, be thrilled with silver and embrace bronze.  When you get the ribbon for just showing up, wear it with pride.

Love,

80-percent.com


erin-phelan-headshotErin Phelan is a health and fitness professional, personal trainer and writer. Find her at www.80-percent.com and follow her on FacebookTwitter and Instagram.